Leah,
It's sounds as if your are getting great advice. I agree that it's definetly Developmental. I have tried those grippers. They can help, but if a child's not ready, it can be frustratting. We use those chubby pencils and markers for my 3's. They are now cutting, which strengthens their muscles and they love playdough and glue! Keep up the good work.
joyce
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