Bobbi-while I agree, that "some" parents are more lenient with rules, I still hold to the fact that blaming solves nothing! Obviously, you were able to witness first hand a possible explanation for behavior-still, sometimes, there are other reasons as well, such as I mentioned earlier- ADD, ADHD, Autism Spectrum- need I say more... Sometimes parents are frustrated just as teachers are, and are clueless as to what approach to take next in having their child/children display "appropriate classroom behavior" - especially if their child/children generally are well behaved in a less structured environment.
While I am a parent who would definately "intervene" on the behavior you mentioned earlier, (whether I was visiting your class or at any other location)- many parents come into a classroom to "observe" how you- the "teacher" handle situations such as these. They are there to learn from you, as well as hopefully find "comfort" in how you treat and care for their "most precious" child/children. They may "choose" to not participate, believing it is "your show" your time to "shine" - a chance to enable them to actually catch a real glance at what actually goes on in your class room each day that they "trust" you to care for their loved ones. They may not agree with how you are handling your classroom either, but feel it is yours, to handle.
I do agree with your tips on redirection and simple clarity in the words you have choosen to accomplish the task of "refocusing the children" while in your classroom- you have realized that it is a responcibility of yours, as their "teacher" to educate yourself, as well as try different techniques for different children, until you have found some that work for you. This is "experience" something a beginning teacher lacks, and the start of a wonderful, rewarding career in teaching many different children, with many different backgrounds and personalities, how to become the best that they can be.
I am also positive by now, that your are fully aware that there are many parents out there who are equally frustrated that they are expected to "participate" with their childs education, yet when they ask how they can help, or to call if help is needed, they hear nothing from teachers until conference time. I hear these frustrations from many parents, who want to be a part, and worry about their children being away from them for long periods of time. Assigning parent volunteer days, (a mandatory sign up sheet) would solve the problem of needing more help in classrooms, as well as giving parents a feeling that they actually are needed, and encouraged to participate. With rising budget cuts, this is an acceptable solution, and with larger classes, parents would only have to volunteer once or twice a month at most.
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