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Date: 5/2/2008 12:45:00 PM
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Author:
Marcia
(marcia_frye@hotmail.com)
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Subject:Too old for the toddler rm/cant potty in the preschool rm
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Dear Colleagues,
I have three 3-year olds who are not potty trained. As the boys are 3 years old, they exceed the age limit for our TODDLER room and need to move to our PRESCHOOL room to comply with our state license. On the other hand, a major requirement for our PRESCHOOL room is that students are potty trained.
1) Should I hire new staff and create a "transition room" for 3-year olds who have not mastered going to the potty?
2) Should I tell parents that their child may not enroll in our PRESCHOOL program due to potty issues?
3) Should I leave the 3-year olds in the toddler room and make an amendment to our toddler room age limit within state guidelines?
Hoping for a solution,
Marcia
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Date: 5/17/2008 6:26:00 PM
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Author:
beth nimeh
(b1twin@comcast.net)
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Subject:3 years old not potty trained
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I believe you might need to change you rules. For the safety of the children you need to move the 3 year olds up.In my experience boys take on averge to 39 months to be potty trained if the parents are not in tune with the potty clues and missed the window of opportunity it might take longer to potty training the boys. It must be a joint effort.the parents might need direction and might be very thankful if you make the change in specific cases not to be potty trained. Today with the new diapers they keep so dry, I believe it a conspiracy to keep parent buying diapers longer. But usually around three boys almost get it overnight and are potty trained. Keep up the great work and i hope you find a solution there is always a way to keep everyone happy.
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Date: 5/20/2008 11:06:00 AM
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Author:
Rudy
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Subject:potty
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I agree that you need to change the rules. Boys especially take longer to potty than girls. Work with the parents on helping them potty train. pullup help in trainning they could be used.
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Date: 5/30/2008 12:27:00 PM
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Author:
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Subject:OUr church preschool lets all the parent...
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OUr church preschool lets all the parent know that the child must me potty trained in order to be the prek3 class. And so far we have never had a problem. this has given the parents all summer to work with their child. We also start potty training in the prek2 class with the parents help at home.
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Date: 5/30/2008 9:11:00 AM
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Author:
P. Walsh
(kb8ywp@hotmail.com)
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Subject:change expectations
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I think you'll have to change the rules. I've noticed that boys tend to take an awfully long time to train these days. Sometimes it's physical, but I think there's an emotional component to it. My own son was so stressed about potty training that he was 4 before he was fully trained. Then it was only a matter of days when he was ready, which was a relief. Peers using the potty had no affect on him. His teachers kept assuring me that it was ok and he wouldn't go to Kindergarten in diapers. They were so supportive and reminded me not to push the issue until all three of us agreed he was ready. It was good to have second and third professional opinions. I agree with the idea of putting a child who seems otherwise ready (and that is WAY important or you'll only make it take longer) in with plastic pants or even cloth diapers if you can stand it. Most of the boys I have taught need to be really, really, REALLY aware of their discomfort before they're willing to change to use the potty. I only know two who bought into the whole "big boy" ploy, but they had older brothers as role models.
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Date: 5/30/2008 12:03:00 PM
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Author:
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Subject:I agree that the kids need to move up to...
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I agree that the kids need to move up to be with those of their own age. Is there any possible way to set up a facility for changing in the preschool room? I have found with the older children I don't even need a changing table, I just take them in the bathroom stall & change them standing up. I have a mat (just the folding nap-mat type of thing) if I need it, but never used it this year. Of course, if you can hire an aide to help with toileting needs that would be great, but I don't know that a completely separate class would be good for these kids socially. As others have said, it is not uncommon for children to not be fully toilet trained until they are almost four, so having that be a requirement may not be developmentally appropriate.
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Date: 5/30/2008 12:35:00 PM
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Author:
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Subject:not potty trained by 3
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First is this a preschool or a day care center. Is it year round or a regular school calender. Most pre-schools are set up the same as the school system. I would go with informing the parent that next year for the Pre k 3 all children must be potty trained. this would give them all summer to get it done. I have check around and all the preschools that I called had the same guidelines as to when a child should be potty trained. You might want to call your area preschools and find out what they do.
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Date: 5/30/2008 1:44:00 PM
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Author:
Silvie
(Silvie133@yahoo.com)
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Subject:re: too old for the toddler rm/cant potty in the preschool rm
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In our preschool, we don't have any potty restrictions. We encourage our children, but we don't force the issue. Being a "Big Boy" and in "Big Boy" is difficult. My own children potty trained differently, because one is a boy and one is a girl. My advice is to have a transition room if you can't change the rules. Don't punish the children for something they can't control.
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Date: 5/30/2008 1:44:00 PM
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Author:
Silvie
(Silvie133@yahoo.com)
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Subject:re: too old for the toddler rm/cant potty in the preschool rm
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In our preschool, we don't have any potty restrictions. We encourage our children, but we don't force the issue. Being a "Big Boy" and in "Big Boy" is difficult. My own children potty trained differently, because one is a boy and one is a girl. My advice is to have a transition room if you can't change the rules. Don't punish the children for something they can't control.
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Date: 5/31/2008 5:43:00 AM
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Author:
Jennifer
(jglilangelfriends@hotmail.com)
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Subject:state regulations are touchy
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This child care you work in should have a seperate room for three year olds transitioning into the preschool age. Or, a seperate room for three year olds whose parents aren't ready for 3 year old preschool. Thats how we did it. If they weren't ready for preschool they wait til four year old preschool. I don't think that three year olds are always ready for potty training.
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Date: 6/2/2008 6:55:00 AM
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Author:
Mary Ellen
(maryellen@harborhousemdi.org)
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Subject:Potty Training
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I would suggest that your school needs to look at the toilet training requirement for the preschool classroom. When I took over as director of the program where I am now, children were required to be potty trained to attend. We took children at 30 months and I saw an awful lot of children who were stressed because parents had pushed the potty training before the chidlren were ready, in order to get them in to our program. I changed the rule and we now accept children in diapers ~ no matter what the age. I feel that an arbitrary number does a disservice to many children who are just on a different developmental schedule than the "norm". I have seen children absolutely solidly trained at 30 months and others who were trained at 30 months and then decided to "untrain" later, because they hadn't really been ready. I have seen children in such a power struggle with parents who, while totally capable, put off being "trained" until 50 months! Now our children move out of diapers when THEY are ready. We work in partnership with the parents and the child, and it is much less stressful for everyone concerned. What's the big hurry anyway? Most of them won't graduate from high school in a diaper! ;-)
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Date: 6/2/2008 12:57:00 PM
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Author:
A. Bailey
(lilmama4697@yahoo.com)
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Subject:Transition Room
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Dear Marcia,
I work in a daycare on a military instillation, for this reason we cannot reject ANY children unless we are unable to accomidate their needs. This being the case we experience what you are talking about all the time. I was a lead teacher of a "transition room" and it worked out wonderful for the teachers and the children. A 3-year old may be ready to move in all the major areas, (socially, cognitively,physically and linguistically), and their only issue is potty training. I had a very bright 3-year old boy in my "transition room" who had a bad experience during potty training and began to then regress. Having a transition room gives these children the challenges they need and gives them a chance to learn these self-help skills of pottying. I would let the parents know that these children would need to be able to change their own clothes and that we would need to come up with a plan for school and at home so that we would be working together to accomplish our goal. Parents then felt supported and realized they didn't need to force their child to use the potty. Most of the children moved along in three to six months and this also became a great room for children who were potty trained yet not ready for the larger enviornment of a preschool classroom. Hope this helps and good luck!
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Date: 6/6/2008 2:22:00 PM
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Author:
Leona
(leonardor0 @ aol.com)
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Subject:3 yr old potty training
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we had the same problem at our facility for quite some time, and we unsure of what to do. we did make a transition room, but someone suggested we provide parents with potty training DVD. After looking at a few, we found what we think is the best potty training for boys and girls its called Once upon a potty for him and once upon a potty for her. Its by Alona Frankel who published one of the best toilet training books, as we later found out. we gave these dvds to parents and BINGO,, in an average of only 3 weeks. really works. needless to say - parents were thrilled, and we solved a dillema. we have a wholesale account with a kids educational media company called Kids-Cds and their site is www.kidscds.org , in case you are interested. we also tried elmo's potty time, but not every child/parent likes elmo, so we quickly had to switch.
hope this helps.
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Date: 5/30/2008 8:28:00 AM
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Author:
Kathy Helseth
(khelseth@cfcsyakima.org)
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Subject:potty training
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Boys do take longer to get the idea. Teachers and parents need to be on the same page doing the same thing at home and school. Sometimes it is a power and control issue and this is definitely a situation where the child has the power to decide to do it or not. Our experience is if they are not potty trained before moving to the older class, they are really quick because of peer modeling! We sometime have the child wear "big kid pants" with the diaper/pull-up over it. Then the child can feel the wetness and get the connection! Good luck and remember--they never start Kindergarten in diapers (unless there are physical problems!)
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Date: 5/30/2008 8:53:00 AM
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Author:
Phyllis
(phyllish@centraldisciples.org)
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Subject:potty issue
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I agree that many parents miss the window of opportunity for potty training, causing the child to have a harder time with it. We encourage our parents to put their child in , sometimes with plastic pants over them, so they feel a little uncomfortable when wet. We also explain to the parents that they really need to work with us and get their child trained, because we don't have changing facilities in our three year old room. Most of the parents do want their children to go into the next room. We have had good luck with most of the children and parents by sharing these ideas with them.
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Date: 5/30/2008 10:41:00 AM
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Author:
ann costello
(ameantoy@aol.com)
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Subject:toilet training
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My daughter died when my grandson was 2, he is now 8, he stills poops in his pants. Is there anything that can be done? His father whips him & doesn"t see that it"s not working.
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Date: 5/30/2008 11:20:00 AM
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Author:
Elizabeth Gay
(kgandlg@hotmail.com)
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Subject:Toilet Training Grandparent Concern
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I think that your grandson is not responding to your son-in-laws "punishment" because of the attention factor. I think that perhaps he feels that the attention from his father, despite the negativity of it, is still attention. Perhaps treating him with more dignity and respect would be the better approach. He may be very embarssed about it and although it's not the reponse he wants, at least he's being acknowledged. Your son-in-law needs to remember that he is a child and is 100% relying on his father for the emotional support that goes along with getting older. If they cannot come to a reasonable solution then I think it is appropriate to involve possibly the school counselor. It may not be affecting his school relationships or even his work, but eventually it will. As a grandparent it is probably very difficult to interject, however something MUST be done. This could end in a great deal of hurt for this child. Your concerns are certainely valid, I wish you the best of luck.
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Date: 5/30/2008 7:10:00 PM
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Author:
Jeanne
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Subject:Toilet training
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I am not too sure which aspect of your problem disturbs me more. The fact the your son-in-law is physically abusing your grandson for a bodily function control, especially after the tragic loss of a parent. Or the fact the you are allowing this abuse to continue. As grandparents you do have rights as to the care of this child. Contact your local Child Care Council or seek legal advice in this matter. This physical abuse will only lead to more problems for this child!!
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Date: 6/2/2008 6:35:00 AM
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Author:
Mary Ellen
(maryellen@harborhousemdi.org)
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Subject:Potty Training
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From what you say your grandson is being physically abused and you should report this to the agency in your state that protects children. No child should ever be whipped for any reason. And a child certainly should not be punished for bathroom accidents. This poor boy needs someone to step in and protect him.
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Date: 6/6/2008 5:55:00 AM
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Author:
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Subject:potty trainning
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I agree that the child is seeking attention for an emotional issue. But we all on this site do NOT know what the fatehr did to this child. A swat on the is NOT abuse. If he is beaten with objects etc. That warrants an abuse call. Too many times we call on what is NOT abuse and when it is no action is taken. There are too many people trying to tell others what to do and what not to do. A simple swat on the is not child abuse. I do agree that this child just needs the emotional attention.
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Date: 6/2/2008 7:36:00 AM
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Author:
Sally
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Subject:potty training & 3 year old room
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We all know that development is individualized and so should the rules for who moves to the three year-old room. This is another case for mixed-age groupings! In fact, restricting a child from an appropriate educational environment might be illegal as a violation of ADA rules as well. My suggestion is to move the children to the appropriate educational environment AND take a closer look at your toilet learning policies and toileting procedures. I agree with the teacher who suggested diaper changing while the child is standing.
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Date: 6/2/2008 4:36:00 PM
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Author:
Patti
(pattikakesm@netscape.com)
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Subject:potty training
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Move them up the number of times during the day that they will need diapers is limited and should be able to be handled by the classroom teachers. Another major things is that peer presure at this age is wonderful. Had a child who has recently mastered the event work with those in training. They willvcatch on rather quickly as I have seen this happen many, many times.
Good Luck
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Date: 6/2/2008 8:52:00 PM
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Author:
elizabeth
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Subject:meeting your own bathroom needs
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Being able to meet their own bathroom needs is a factor in the child's ability to move on. It is an indicator of the child's growth and development. If a child is unable to master this right now then they are not ready to master other areas as well. It is a developmental issue that has been complicated by slick merchandising! Pull ups should be illegal! We have a transitions class in our school and children are able to move up when they show self control in many areas- including the bathroom, using their words, circle time focus, making choices, and more. I also think it requires more teacher time to accomplish these tasks and that is another reason to have a transition room with a lower student ratio. They just need more!
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Date: 6/3/2008 6:28:00 AM
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Author:
Deb Black
(Dblack5278@aol.com)
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Subject:POtty Training
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I have a boy in my preschool class who is going to kindergarten this fall (three months away). He still requires a pull up or diaper. I still allow him in the preschool class. I am afraid he may have medical or emotional issues affecting his training so I feel it is unfair to hold him back. I have tried putting him back in the tiolet training class but he is too large and although he enjoys the day, the parents are not comfortable with it (they could be alot of the child's pproblem as he still had a bottle nad a pacifier until about 6 months ago). I agree that opull ups should be illegal - I know of centers in my area that do not allow pull ups.
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Date: 6/3/2008 6:36:00 AM
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Author:
Alison
(preschool@bslcks.org)
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Subject:potty training
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We changed our policy this year due to the large number of 3's who are not potty trained. We added an aide to the classroom.
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